Walkthrough Part III: The Nostalgia Kingdom

Welcome to the Nostalgia Kingdom! It’s not exactly where you were planning to end up, but it’s nice, sunny, warm, and HOLY SHIT WHAT’S THAT IN THE SKY.

How do I put JewWario’s house back together?
You don’t. You just rob him. That’s how things work in adventure-game-land. We’ll get to that. Have a walk around first.

How do I get past the snotty security guard?
You need an ID card. JewWario has one. It’s buried in the rubble of his former house.

JewWario won’t let me steal his ID card.
LordKat needs to be present before he’ll let you steal it. LordKat appears after you’ve talked to the castle guard.

How do I get into the King’s office?
You have to knock him out. Benzaie knows how. (The dialogue option with Benzaie will only appear if you have tried to open the office door.)

How do I knock the King out?
Smoke ‘im out. No, I’m serious. Grab a pot plant from the King’s garden and dip it in the blue European liquid, then give it to the King.

How do I knock out Electric Raul Julia?
Spoony knows how.

What am I supposed to give Chester in the dungeon?
He wants change! LordKat plays arcade machines. He’s got change.

LordKat demands an apology. How am I supposed to get an apology out of the King, now that he’s out cold?
There’s stationary in his office. (You can’t take it until you’ve talked to LordKat about the apology letter.) Type up an apology letter on the King’s typewriter. LordKat’ll never know the difference.

The apology letter still needs a signature. How do I get the King’s signature?
The King uses his handprint as signature, which is handy for us, since he’s still out cold. Grab the ink blotter and ink bottle from the King’s desk. Put one on the other (this gives you an ink-smeared blotter). Rub the blotter on the “sleeping” King, then rub the apology letter on him.

So, you give LordKat the apology letter. He gives you change, which you give to Chester, and then … okay, who woke him up?

« Back to Part II: The Pixellated Forest ⎮ Onwards to Part IV: The Nerd Empire »


  • I think everyone’s noticed the Katamari near JewWario’s house, but did you spot the Prince standing by the parasol having a beer? He disappears when JewWario’s house gets demolished; presumably he gets blown into orbit. Which is cool, ‘cos that’s where his Dad lives.
  • JewWario tells you about Spoony’s magic lamp, and you can call up Spoony and yell at him about it. If you don’t have that piece of information and call up Spoony, the dialogue is different.
  • That castle looks familiar, doesn’t it? Ever played the first King’s Quest game? Yes, that’s 1986, baby.
  • Benzaie’s tower, however, is nicked from Conquests of Camelot. Yup, it’s Camelot’s tower, as rendered by a desperately talented artist at Sierra who only had 16 colors at his/her disposal.
  • I tried to go for an open-area type thing with this part, where you have several objectives at one time. Trouble is, LucasArts does this sort of thing brilliantly (e.g. the Melonweed-part of Full Throttle), and I don’t. So you can do things out of order. I tried to compensate for most of them (e.g. if LordKat asks for the apology letter while the King is still awake, the King will tell LordKat to fuck off), but some people still get a bit confused because you can basically knock out the King for no good reason. The order, at least in my head, was: you go see the King. The King tells you to fuck off and die, but Chester knows how to get to the Nerd Empire. So the main objective is, in fact, to get change for Chester.